The Crying Game

Reality TV tends to be a rather emotional affair, especially when you consider that most shows are competitions, and then being video taped 24 hours a day doesn't help. That being said, there are points where the crying gets ridiculous. Just ask Jen on Big Brother, after she cried when her picture wasn't good enough. Who does that? What a moron.

That brings me to a friend of mine I just got a phone call from. He met a girl at a party who was going on a dating show with tennis pro Mark Phillipoussis (sp?). They hit it off, and decided they'd keep in touch after the show, whether she bags Mark or not. She was booted not too far in, so they got back together, and a romance ensued.

He noticed some weird behavior from her, like when she would cry over small things like a woman cutting her in line at the 7-Eleven, or in having a conversation about baseballs at a Dodgers game laced with sexual innuendo. Sometimes she'd say "I don't even know why I'm crying", which made him even more apprehensive. He was, after all, considering taking her to meet his mom.

Anyway, so her show airs, and the shit hits the fan. She's crying in every scene. She's crying next to him while they watch it because she's so embarrassed she's crying so much on the show. He told her it was all right, but then he stopped returning her phone calls. I asked what she was like when he officially called it off with her.

"She was pissed at me."

"Ooh, crying and angry. Not a good look."

"No, she didn't cry. She was defiant. Even when I told her it was from all her crying, she didn't cry. It almost made me regret dumping her."

"Umm, I can see that, a sudden back bone after all that weepiness."

"Yeah, and she also straightened her curly hair and was wearing this hot dress." He shook his head and thought for a second. "I guess it's like the saying: Women, you can't live with them..."

"...And they can't do stand-up comedy."

Bill Vendall or Rutherford Bixby III

Matty the Mainer's friend Heather showed him this video, which he showed me, that had Sanjaya telling everyone he was graduate art student Bill Vendall, and that his Idol stint was all apart of some graduate project.

That reminded me of my buddy, Rutherford Bixby III, descendant of president Rutherford B. Hayes on his maternal grandmother's side. He was a graduate student in cultural anthropology specializing in American pop culture. He's been on Big Brother twice. You may know him better as Chicken George.

It was interesting watching him on the Big Brother All Stars, because there was this understood wink-wink nudge-nudge whenever he talked about how smart the Doctor was, or when he became a member of Chilltown. I really thought he was going to give himself away when he almost put the Doctor up for elimination, but luckily Mike Boogie stepped in and bailed him out with his little power play about his "power that can change the game" thing. That Rudy, dumb like a fox.

Mads and I saw him present a paper based on his doctorate dissertation after his first appearence on the show, and we figured the game was up. But CBS didn't seem to care, and he made the All Stars show. Chicken George and Rutherford Bixby III were such disperate personas they figured it wouldn't matter if they brought him back. They were right.