Small Midwestern Town

I was headed to Chicago for a week, and my buddy Todd offered me a lift out there. He's kind of a gypsy cat, who moves where the spirit takes him, and he was headed out to South Dakota to do a little fishing or something. He's also a ninja with a good heart... something I should've considered before I accepted his offer of a ride.

We stopped in some small town to get gas. While we were there, some thugs tried to trash the place, and Todd dealt with them. I grabbed a pack of Twinkies and a Slim Jim, which was on the house. Todd then found out what the deal was.

Some guy named something or other was planning to take over the town and turn it into one big mall/shopping center, something to rival Tyson's Corner in Virginia. So he was planning to force all the small businesses out of town... no matter what it took. Todd was determined to stop him, because he looks out for the little guy.

I knew I needed to catch the first bus out to Chicago when we went to a bar, and the impossibly hot waitress told me she couldn't be attracted to me, because she was supposed to be Todd's love interest. My role was the wisecracking sidekick, and I just couldn't allow myself to be degraded like that. So I split.

To be honest, I was a little disappointed. I'm quite the shop-aholic, and I think there's really nothing wrong with emptying out a few small midwestern towns in the name of commerce... and if anyone stands in your way, you deal with them...