I was putting away some laundry for Mads, my Norwegian companion, the other day, when I noticed an article of clothing I found to be very interesting: a Doug Christie 13 jersey. Everyone knows that that jersey is the international sign that some one is being whipped by his woman. Friends give that jersey to friends to let them know: dude, your woman controls you like Doug Christie’s.
I confronted Mads with my new found knowledge.
"A while back, there was this woman, Contessa. She had everything: looks, brains, sexual prowess. I would do anything for her. I wanted to marry her."
"No!"
"Yes, it’s true."
"Well what happened? You obviously didn’t marry her."
"My mom didn’t like her."
"And that was it?"
"That was it."
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