You're Either Old or in High School

Mads, my Norwegian companion, and I were meeting Matty, my personal biographer, at a local coffee shop so I could give him my weekly wrap-up to put in his blog. These two cute, yet young, girls were looking at Mads and me and laughing. One of them just happened to be at the counter grabbing a napkin while Matty was waiting for his Venti Iced Latte.

"That chick was talking on her phone about you," he said.

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah, she said you were a hot old guy."

"Old guy? I’m not even thirty-eight yet."

"Five days," Mads said. He and I share a birthday, one of the cool things we have in common.

"Of course you’re an old guy," Matty said. "And I am too."

"Okay," I said, "I’ll bite. What’ve you got?"

He opened his backpack and pulled out an anthropology journal. On the front cover I saw listed under his name: "You’re Either Old or in High School: How Teenagers Frame Their World, and How This Affects Teacher/Student Relations in the Classroom".

"Long enough title?"

"Here’s the deal: there was this ring tone with a high pitched sound that only young people could hear. High school kids were using it so they could take calls in class. Anyway, this one teacher’s only 28, and she can hear the ring tone too. The kids were shocked, because they were certain only kids could hear it. You’re either old, or you’re in high school."

"You based an entire journal article on that thesis?"

"Si. I did an ethnography of a high school in Maine, examining the interactions between the students and teachers. My findings were quite profound."

"And how about you? Did the kids think you were old since you’re not in high school?"

"Yep, but a Cool Old Guy."

"Oh, because you were into their music and watched The Hills?"

"Nope, because I bought them beer."