I've never had a moustache. By the time I could successfully grow one, they weren't so cool for my age bracket. They still hold some fascination, though. This is especially true when I see a guy whose moustache has collected his post-nasal drip. It's a very utilitarian function, if you ask me.
I've always been obsessed with how to deal with a runny nose in an emergency without a Kleenex or toilet paper or something. I remember, when I was in kindergarten, a boy sneezed, and this snot blasted out of his nose and onto his upper lip. I was outraged, because his mom sent him to school in a short sleeve shirt. You don't send a kid with a cold to school in a short sleeve shirt, I thought. It just seemed obvious, and it stuck with me to this day.
"What the hell are you staring at?"
It was the man with the moustache and runny nose. I scraped my upper lip with my index finger, and he hastily turned his head and cleaned it with his pocket square.
"Thanks man."
Why was he thanking me? I didn't think I was informing him about his drippage, I thought I was indicating my marvel at his moustache's ability to stop said drippage. Whatever.
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