American Idol Audition

Pageant Girl was still hanging around our apartment, much to my chagrin, and her new thing was a desire to audition for American Idol down in New York. She thought she had what it took to be a star, and wanted to know what Mads, my Norwegian companion, and I thought. Mads convieniently forgot to tell her he knew Simon Cowell personally.

She sang Kelly Clarkson's "A Moment Like This", and it was so bad that Mads and I wore faces similar to those a two-year old would wear after being given a lemon and unknowingly eating it. I spoke first.

"Um... I think... I don't know if that song was right for you."

"Woman, you sucked. Don't quit your day job, whatever that is."

"Oh, you're such a kidder, Mads. How was it really?"

"I'm Norwegian, we don't kid. Woman, you can't sing if your life depended on it... which should be all right, because I couldn't imagine a scenario where it would."

She looked on the verge of tears, so I jumped in.

"I don't necessarily think it's your ability to sing. That song just wasn't made for your voice. I'd try another."

"Like that Ashley Simpson song, 'Pieces of Me'?" Mads said.

I looked at him, he looked at me, and then together:

On a Monday, I was waiting... and on Tuesday I was waiting... and Thursday I can't sleep. Then the Phone rings... I hear you... the darkness... a clear view... you've come to rescue me

Pageant girl was none too impressed.

"Are you guys gonna listen to me sing or what?"

"Sing the chorus with us, Pageant Girl," I said.

Oh, it seems like I can finally rest my head on something real... I like the way that feels. Oh, it's as if you know me better than I ever knew myself... I love how you can tell... all the piece-ass, piece-ass, piece-ass of me.

She stormed out of the room and slammed the door while Mads and I were giggling.

"Shouldn't you go talk to her?"

"Probably, but Days is going to be on in a few minutes, and I don't want to get into some big thing that may run into it."

"Oh."

We both kind of just looked at the floor for a second. Mads lifted his head first, and looked at me.

"For what it's worth, I thought your idea about doing a new song was a good one."

"Thank you, Mads."

"You're welcome."