Pirates!

Mads, my Norwegian companion, and I decided to go see what all the fuss was about with that new pirates movie with Johnny Depp and we were very upset that we did. Considering we didn't pay because we snuck in after seeing Al Gore's An Inconvienient Truth, it wasn't so bad, but it was bad enough. I've never seen anything that lacked more imagination and creativity in my life. Afterwards Mads and I decided we needed to cleanse the palate with some more drinking, and we hit a nearby bar.

That's when the Pirates invaded. We first heard their Pirate Call:

"Haaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy..."

We turned. There were about seven of them, dressed in tight designer T-shirts and jeans with impeccably styled hair and tanned skin. I didn't see any of them go to the juke box, but suddenly the song changed from the Gin Blossom's "Hey Jealousy" to a house remix of Cher's "If I Could Turn Back Time." These were real Pirates, and they were serious. They came here to commandeer this bar and make it Fabulous. A well-built man wearing only a pair of spandex bicycle shorts and a bow tie offered us some Jell-O shots. I looked at Mads, and we shrugged our shoulders and each took one. I pointed my head in the direction of the dancing Pirates, and Mads nodded. We jumped up and started dancing with them. Hopefully the third movie will be this good.