Mads: Olsok

With yesterday being St. Patrick's Day, I thought it might be nice to share with everyone the Norwegian equivalent: Olsok, or St. Olav's Day (literally "Olav's Wake). Observed on July 29th, the day commemorates the death of St. Olav in his attempt to unify Norway and make it a Christian nation. By all accounts, he wasn't a bad guy.

Now one must keep in mind that I celebrate the holiday and my Norwegianess in a slightly different way than my fellow countrymen. I don't do a feast of traditional Norwegian food and a trip to St. Olaf's Church in Oslo. Instead, I paint the Norwegian flag on my face, find the nearest late sixties model convertible, hot wire it, and drive as far and as fast as I can while listening to Eric Carmen's "Make Me Lose Control." Nothing makes me more proud of my heritage.

Last year I was in Boston, and my Boston friend insisted on celebrating with me. I was leery of this, simply because car theft is better done as a one man operation. Finally I relented, and agreed to let him join me.

There was a cherry red '68 Corvette parked about two blocks from his apartment that I had been keeping my eye on for about a month before. I knew when the owner would park it on the street: it just happened to be every Saturday, and Olsok fell on a Saturday too. I couldn't believe my luck.

On the fateful day I hid in the bushes until about noon. I saw him park the car and run inside with his girlfriend. He even left the top down for me. It took me 30 seconds to get the car started and on the road. I picked up my Boston friend in front of his apartment.

That's when my luck turned. He directed me down a side street in Dorchester. At the same time we were there, an argument had turned violent, and shots were fired. A stray bullet hit the back driver's side tire, which sent the car momentarily out of control. Before I could regain control of the vehicle, I hit a street lamp, crushing the front end. More shots were fired, but I knew we needed to get as far away from the stolen car as possible before the cops came to mitigate the violent dispute in front of us. My Boston friend was paralyzed with fear. It was difficult, but I hoisted him up on my back and we made our way to the nearest T stop.

I decided from that point on, I would never take a friend with me as I celebrated Olsok.